18 entered not with a bang, but with whispers over steaming chai. With the outlines of my fingers on her hand. With the feel of a plastic edge in my palm.
The tattoo was amazing. Blunt pressure, sharp pricks, loud hums. Strangely reassuring.
Then he started on the part over bone.
Thank god I took up meditation. Instead of the blunt pressure boring into my skull, the feel of sheets under my hands. Instead of a thousand burning jabs leaving a thousand shivers down my spine, a thousand soft kisses down those same bones. Instead of the constant drone of the machine, quantum physics.
Instead of my fingers indented in her hand, a simple exercise in sending myself away.
I think she was more happy that it worked than I was.
I spent today with some of the most amazing people in my life. I just can't get past how amazing it all was.
I can't get past eighteen.
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